Breaking Generational Trauma For Yourself and Loved Ones-5 Tips

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Angela D. Coleman

Angela D. Coleman, Ìbíyínká Oladojá Oyèwọlá, is a nonprofit executive, social entrepreneur, and scholar-practitioner dedicated to transforming communities through innovation, systems-level thinking, and equity-centered solutions.

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Breaking generational trauma for yourself and loved ones is a goal for many global girls. Sisterhood Agenda is here for you.

Childhood trauma, such as ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences), impacts all aspects of your life, often extending unresolved well into adulthood. Childhood trauma, as painful as is, can also motivate you in breaking generational trauma for yourself and loved ones.

Breaking generational trauma can be the ultimate act of love for yourself, your Ancestors, and your descendants.

Tip 1: Understand trauma

ACEs are traumatic experiences (for example, sexual abuse and domestic violence) that one has experienced before adulthood.  ACEs have a profound impact on self-development and womanhood.  When compared to boys, girls disproportionately experience more ACEs more often and at earlier ages.

Unresolved trauma can manifest itself in all ways and is unique to each person.

Childhood trauma can lower self-esteem and self-perception. Girls who are abused often suffer from lack of confidence and trust in relationships. Depression, anxiety, eating disorders, sleep disorders, fatigue, substance abuse, dissociation, intrusive thoughts, painful memories, triggers, and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) are all common outcomes for women who experience trauma as a young girl.

Tip 2: Know that you are The One

With an expanded capacity to inform others, childhood trauma is not destiny.  By healing ourselves, we can also enlighten others. This is how we are breaking generational trauma for yourself and loved ones.

At this historical moment, feminine consciousness is heightened and expanded.  Let’s embrace the power of change!  We are more informed about the high prevalence of violence against women and girls, unreported incidents of sexual assault and harassment in the workplace, gender inequality, and the impact of childhood trauma.

Tip 3: Build sisterhood

With a circle of women who can uniquely understand our pain, sisterhood builds connection and resilience.

With sisterhood, you are never alone. My life’s work demonstrates the fact that we are the ones who can save ourselves.

Sisterhood connection and resilience decreases loneliness, depression, anxiety, disease, and other negative health outcomes. The various aspects of girl trauma are rarely examined in this holistic health and social context, a highly elevated and enlightened level of trauma-informed self-care.

Tip 4: Heal mindfully

Mindfully focusing on the present allows you to process your feelings when you heal. This is especially important because breaking generational trauma for yourself and loved ones often makes you an outlier or “black sheep” of the family. While you heal, the family’s dysfunction becomes most clear and obvious. They may feel sensitive, as if they are being judged based on your desire to do things differently. They may be envious of your capacity to reject old wounds that hurt and turn them into scars that inform and heal. They may simply fail to understand what’s going on as you heal and are breaking generational trauma. That’s okay. Let it be what it is.

Your healing IS breaking generational trauma for yourself and loved ones.

While you heal, you can maintain grace and compassion, especially self-compassion. Give yourself permission, time, and energy to focus on yourself completely and unconditionally without apology or regret.  Recognize that healing is not selfish. More than being the epitome of self-care and self-preservation, healing also pushes the reset button for future generations.

Tip 5: Focus on the future

Being of service to myself and others over the last three decades solidifies trauma consciousness and healing as the blossoming of a new reality, not a trend.  With increased awareness about girl trauma and its impacts, more women are looking for ways to engage in breaking generational trauma for yourself and loved ones.

While the process might not make you the most popular family member right now, it sets up a special, healthy foundation for generations to come.  Spirit recognizes your greatness for creating this new reality. You, through your health and healing process, are creating resources that can forever connect, empower, and support you and your family’s journeys.