5 Things You Must Do If You Are in an Abusive Relationship

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Angela D. Coleman

Angela, Founder & President of Sisterhood Agenda, is an award-winning sisterhood activist, women's empowerment specialist, and author.

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If you are in an abusive relationship, seek help immediately.  Be open to receiving support in new and different ways.  Help your sisters who may also need your help.

1. Know that you are not alone.

1. Know that you are not alone.

Most women and girls are abused by someone they know and love: a husband or boyfriend, parent/stepparent, other family member, babysitter, or teacher. There are people who can and will support you as you get through this.

2. Reach out.

2. Reach out.

It usually helps to share the fact that you are abused with someone you know and trust. If you do not know anyone to talk to, call your local domestic violence hotline and speak to someone trained to help. Too many of us are abused and our silence keeps the cycle going.

3. Understand that it is not your fault.

3. Understand that it is not your fault.

Manipulation, control, and mental abuse are often part of a physically abusive relationship and you may question yourself. Stay strong and know that you do not deserve to be mistreated.

4. Be safe.

4. Be safe.

Inform neighbors to call the police, plan your escape, and have an emergency plan to leave with your government identification, important papers, clothing, and hidden money.

5.Help your sisters.

5.Help your sisters.

Use your experience, knowledge, and understanding to help others who need your support and guidance during a rough time. We need to be there for each other. A sister is a friend for life.

International Resources

National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
For anonymous, confidential help, 24/7, please call THE NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) 1.800.787.3224 (TTY)

National Domestic Violence Helpline.org UK
24-hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline 0808 2000 247

Maitri, Helping Women Help Themselves in South Asia Toll Free Helpline – 1 (888) 862-4874 (1-888-8MAITRI)

Zazi Where to Get Help  National counselling line: 0861-322-322

Freephone 24-Hour National Domestic Violence Helpline, Run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge 0808 2000 247