Owning your sexuality is powerful and it’s not just about sex.
It’s about accepting and embracing your female energy. It’s about not feeling ashamed of being a woman doing a “man’s job.” It’s being confident in your own skin and not having to prove to anyone how courageous, brilliant, and independent you are.
While I’ve said that owning your sexuality is not just about sex, sex is still a part of it. It’s also about eliminating the shame and embarrassment of knowing about sex, desires, and pleasure.
Here are tips on how you can start owning your sexuality:
Owning your sexuality is being comfortable with all aspects of your success.
Don’t be ashamed of your success and definitely don’t invalidate it. When you are being complimented for your success, accept it as the winner that you are! Keep your feet on the ground but celebrate your victories.
Learn about sexuality and body positivity.
Owning your sexuality means getting in tune with your mind, body, and soul. This means embracing your physical appearance, your curves, and all aspects of your physical self.
They know this is rude but it’s quite common for people to give comments on your weight and it could sometimes be detrimental to your emotional and mental health, even when it comes from a stranger you don’t know, like from a troll on the internet.
You know what? Don’t mind them. Don’t dwell on what other people think of you. What’s important is what you think about yourself.
On my second point, you shouldn’t be ashamed to talk about sex with your partner, your friends, or with your OB-GYN. It is not taboo. You cannot be called degrading words for wanting to talk about sex. Remember that.
Do things that you find pleasurable, listen to yourself, and understand that this time is about you.
What gets you in the mood to be confident? Or sensual? It could be getting a massage or going to the spa. Or having your favorite glass of vino while soaked in a bubble bath. Or meditating, or even indulging yourself in some sweet treats every once in a while.
Focus on what your mind and body tells you about what’s pleasurable.
Be assertive in asking for what you really want and don’t just say yes because you feel obligated.
This applies at home, at work, and in the bedroom. Don’t say it when you don’t mean it. Tell people what you want and don’t try to people-please all the time.
Do this from a center of calm and courage.
Be a strong, brave, and sexy woman by embracing your female nature.
Strengthen your traditionally defined male attributes like drive and ambition to follow your passion. Even if it means doing work that men usually do, don’t let people tell you you can’t.
This is a famous quote that I always go back to this when I am doubting myself: “Whether you think you can or you can’t, either way, you’re right.”
Create an unforgettable existence for yourself, leave a mark, leave a legacy, and do something your 80-year-old self will be proud of when you look back on that day.
Let go of your self-limiting beliefs. Why not just think you can? Own your sexuality from your core and everything else will follow.
Photo credit: Diana Simumpande