Sisterhood Agenda

Boosting Your Self-Esteem in Simple Ways

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Boosting your self-esteem helps you deal with your inner self. When you are confident, it is a positive factor in life and you can reap numerous benefits.

Self-esteem is correlated to performance and achievement, interpersonal relationships, and personal contentment.

Having strong self-esteem can help you experience an amazing blissful life.

People who have low self-esteem are often victims of abuse. It can also lead to depression, negative self-talk, and low self-worth.  On the other hand, when people are overly confident they often have an unimaginable sense of entitlement.  Often, they can be arrogant and self-centered.

Having healthy self-esteem and being confident is a healthy balance.

Photo Credit: Kat Jayne, Pexels

Signs of low self-esteem:

  • You consistently ask for validation from other people
  • You are a people pleaser
  • You tend to withdraw socially
  • You don’t believe in your own capabilities
  • You are overly sensitive to criticism
  • You often feel fatigued yet you are not able to sleep
  • You are often preoccupied with personal problems

A simple criticism from your supervisor would mean a lot to you.  Maybe you would beat yourself up for it thinking you failed, even if you didn’t.  This type of thinking can result in a spiral of self-pity.

Photo Credit: Retha Ferguson, Pexels

When you have strong self-esteem you:

  • Are not afraid of criticism and feedback; you think of it as golden nuggets for you to improve
  • You don’t need validation from other people and you are not a people pleaser
  • You are able to say NO
  • You are not afraid to say your opinions out loud
  • Perfection is not a big deal for you
  • You don’t fear failure
  • You know your worth and you accept and love who you are
  • You are humble and not arrogant

Boosting your self-esteem basics

We’ve listed simple ways of boosting your self-esteem below.

1. Be kind to yourself 

Are you kind to your friends and to your family? If the answers yes, then you should also be kind to yourself. If you give compliments to other people you should be able to tell yourself “you’re awesome today.”

2. Don’t be a perfectionist

The thing about being a perfectionist is when you make a mistake (and you will because you’re human), you will start to criticize yourself. Well, guess what?  Nobody’s perfect.

Making mistakes can fuel your dreams.  Treat them as life lessons and don’t dwell on them. Create realistic goals.

3. Every person in the world makes mistakes

You have to keep this in mind.  While you strive to become the best version of yourself know that you may make mistakes.  Making a mistake doesn’t mean that you are not going to reach your goals.

4. Don’t worry about what other people think

Let’s say you gained weight during vacation and your officemates are starting to look at you differently. You just gained weight-so what?

Know within yourself that your weight does not define who you are and you’re perfectly healthy.

When you start to worry about what others think, you will never be free. Think about what you want.

5. Challenge yourself

We all have self-limiting beliefs. “I’ll never be able to learn how to swim.” “Math is my weakness.” “I’m bad at writing.”

These voices inside your head limit you from achieving the unthinkable.

Do you think you’ll never be able to learn how to swim? Enroll in swimming lessons! You’ll be surprised at what you can once you explore that different side of you.

6. Accept failures as part of the journey

When you fail, it’s normal for you to be sad, disappointed, and to beat yourself up for failing. However, once you shift your thinking, failure could be your friend instead of an enemy.

Welcome it as an opportunity to improve, grow, and learn.  As the popular saying goes: “It’s better to try and fail than not trying at all.”

7. Always be ready to learn

Even if you become successful, know that there’s always room for learning. Always be eager and unbiased.  Drop your ego and be willing to learn.

8. Give yourself a pat on the back

Did you make the perfect medium-rare steak? Congratulate yourself, celebrate small victories. It’s a straightforward way to boost your self-esteem.

9. Accept compliments and embrace them

When someone tells you your beautiful and smart, don’t shrug it off. Say thank you and accept it fully. “See that self? You are beautiful and you are smart!”

10. Boosting your self-esteem by focusing on the positive

There are things that we cannot control. For example, maybe you lost your job as an analyst yet your strength is writing and teaching.

Don’t dwell on the fact that you just got fired. Focus on the fact that you’re great at writing and teaching. There’s a whole lot of options waiting for you. The perfect job for you awaits.

11. Follow your heart

Doing what makes you happy will help boost your self-esteem.

12. Stop comparing yourself to other people

Life is not a competition.  Each and everyone of us has their own unique journey. Just because your high school classmate became a CEO at 25 years old doesn’t mean that you are not successful in your own way.

Yes, money is important but it shouldn’t be the most important thing in the world. Personal fulfillment, peace of mind, and family should be.

In a perfectly ideal world, you will have a high paying job, a luxurious home, the latest car, children, or anything else on your dream list. However, not having these things doesn’t mean you are worthless. Set your own goals apart from others.

It’s okay to be imperfect.

13. Practice self-affirmation

The daily practice of affirmations will train your mind to build your confidence and self-esteem.  Do this every day for two weeks or if you can, 21 days as it becomes a habit.


Examples of affirmation for self-esteem:

“I love the person I am becoming.” “I believe in my skills and abilities.” “I am competent, smart, and able.”

Say this out loud or write them.

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